Family Time: Positive Mental Health Strategies for Children & Parents

Emotion Regulation for Children and Families

Children experience many unique, exciting, and challenging experiences as they start a new school year. Family, academics, friendships, and extracurricular activities are just some of the factors that can be a stressor and influence a child’s mental health and well-being. A child’s ability to understand and regulate emotions in healthy ways, plays a major part in their ability to cope with stress.

Genetics, temperament, personality, environment, and other factors such as sleep and nutrition, are just some of the factors that influence how children regulate emotions. Emotion regulation refers to the ability to manage one's emotions in response to stress, whether internal (pressure a child may put on themselves to get good grades) or external (a child experiencing bullying). Some children find it particularly more challenging than others to manage their emotions, which can lead to strong reactions to small or big stressors and disruptive behavior at school or at home.

Difficulty managing emotions may look like:

• Tantrums/emotional outbursts

• Impulsivity/being quick to react

• Aggression/breaking or throwing items

• Moodiness

• Anxiety

• Attention/concentration difficulties

Spending quality family time making crafts.

Teaching children regulation skills, not only helps their emotions, but also positively impacts their behavior, academic outcomes, and social relationships. Children who manage their emotions well are more likely to do well in school, maintain healthy relationships with peers, and have positive self-esteem. Learning how to process and respond to negative emotions and is a skill that can be taught. A central point to teaching children self-regulation skills is not to avoid stressful situations that may be challenging for kids to cope with, but instead to practice, coach and support children through those situations as they find what is most effective for them.

Daily emotion regulation practices parents and caregivers can teach, encourage, and demonstrate, include:

• Positive affirmations and encouragement

• Healthy expression of feelings – art, writing, talking, laughing, praying, crying

• Promote respect and positive relationships and friendships

• Routinely talk to the child about school, friends, and feelings regularly

• Relaxation techniques – deep breathing, muscle relaxation, mindfulness

• Physical activity – sports, stretching, muscle relaxation, yoga

• Mind activities – reading, puzzles, listening to music

Despite the fact that children may not actively seek out a conversation with you, it is important to engage with them on a regular basis so that you become part of the support system they look to when they are experiencing challenges. As you ease into the school year, get to know your child and what works for them!

A practical exercise to help calm BIG feelings:  

• Encourage your child to take deep breaths in through their nose and out through their mouth to calm down.

• Guide your child through a visualization exercise, such as imagining a favorite, peaceful, or calming place.

• Guide your child through a progressive muscle relaxation exercise, where they tense and relax different muscle groups.

• Encourage your child to practice positive affirmations, such as “I am awesome and I am kind”.

• Offer your child an activity, such as drawing, journaling, playing, or playing a musical instrument, to help regulate their emotions.

• Read a story together to engage children in gaining insight into their feelings and to discuss emotional content within the story (i.e. asking questions about how a character may feel).

The Skills for Kids Book Series is a collection of books that encourages the health expression of feelings, showing positive behaviors, and practicing calm down strategies. These skills can be done individually or as a family each day to help stay connected and reduce stress together.

Buy this collection